FUCK THE WORLD

2009-05-03T03:38:00.000-07:00

I'M SORRY FOR MAKING YOU FEEL SHITTY..

2009-03-22T01:02:00.000-07:00

Regret!

i guess i should not have told anyway... now it seem weird... too me surrounding it's really a important thing la.. i just hope it gets better in time to come... welll fun time has come to a ending... two weeks of hell endurance...

i hope i can take it and mentally prepare...

shafik

2009-03-21T23:36:00.000-07:00

the path that i am in doesn't lead me to no where, it's time to get myself a gps to ensure where i get too... not get fuck in the end:D

2009-03-20T19:08:00.000-07:00

oh well it's out already.... how do i feel now I'm not sure either.... all i know the process will be hard... shafik got to take and just smile whatever happen...

many ppl say good one is on the way or u deserve someone better.. too me that's all word of comfort and bullshit.. all my life i have been getting this shit... and i came to a point where i can't be a fuck abt it... words can mean so much just by saying it.. and doing the process or waiting for it can be even tougher.... James told me to move... HONESTLY i want too and trying but time takes it tooooooo slow to heal.. hate those feeling inside hate feeling like this and hate to see my surrounding affected...:(

For now it's just quite time for me and more of myself time......

shafik
the guy learning to take it like a man

2009-03-20T13:12:00.000-07:00

TIME TO MOVE ON LOSER

2009-03-19T12:12:00.000-07:00

been a while since i blog...

when i do blog means i feel shitty.. i have been feeling this way for very long...
ever since i saw the two of u all close..
the feeling of losing is not very... feeling of giving up all those years for some i am close too.. EVEN harder.... why la.. i want to see u and him happy but it seem too me i can but i have been doing it for fucking past don't know how many time... i am weaker then i have ever thought...

waiting years for u is totally not easy... giving up is harder.... i love too see ppl happy
YES i am say i am alright but I AM NOT...
inside me it's like sharp pain of losing...
seeing u and him makes me cry... sigh....

bro make her happy pls

shafik
love to see pl happy

2008-07-28T05:35:00.000-07:00

WILL SHE EVER CALL ME?!

okay i got trick by jasmine la!!!

i thought she clubs?!

and all this while she have been playing along la..

i just found out that she doesn't club la..

@$#^$&%$^#

shit!!
good one.. i have been punk!!

shafik

okay i have recover from dengue:) finally...
thks for those who came down and visited me when i was admitted..:)

2008-07-07T05:14:00.000-07:00

ATC has finally come to a end.. This year atc was a total different experience because I was doing a big project with cherina. We were given a task by AC to conduct a campfire and he wants it a good one.. Hahaha..

Things were under control and I manage to get things done with the help of cherina.. she has played a big part in this project man. Without her I don’t think I can manage to do it sial.. She has never fail to show the wiliness in learning.. I don’t know she macam not human.. hahahah

You know after the campfire was done and over the next thing happen was not to my expectation. I feel its okay to do it. As long cadets are enjoying it.. Those old ci are a total ass la.. at first I took their words too hard. Saying I was doing it for my personal benefit. Balls too you man.. I will never do it for myself. I always do it for the people around me..

Cherina it was never your fault I believe it takes two hands to clap. And I am part of it.. But remember it’s a small problem.. I guess we are looking into it till it’s big problem.. hahah I am all ready for AAR. I am prepared to defend our campfire. hahahaha

I WANT TO THANK ALL CI WHO BELIEVE IN ME AND DID YOUR BEST IN ATC… I RESPECT YOUR HARDWORK IN ALL 3 DAYS..
HOPE U ALL LEARNT SOMETHING IN THIS CAMP..

signing off

SHAFIK BIN MOHD SAID

CADET INSPECTOR

AREA 5

ST GABRIEL ‘S SECONDARY SCHOOL

2008-07-02T06:40:00.000-07:00

Life has been a tough one for me... I seem to have lots of thing running through
my mind. I don’t know things such as me and the current girl I like. I am so
afraid that things will go wrong. Or is it me? I just being an ass.. I mean I
feel it’s normal to be feeling like that for a guy who likes someone. Well I
really hope you’re reading this now. I got to say that I feel heart pain when I
see other guys talking to you, I feel pain when you go clubbing, I feel pain
when times u cancel our meeting and I just got the feeling that sooner or later
we will fade apart. Sigh
I really don’t know. Every time I like someone, the
thing will never happen la. She will hate me la or just totally cheat me… arhh.

shafik
loser once more.

2008-05-25T10:54:00.000-07:00

WELL AFTER SEEING WHAT I SAW...

LOOKS I HAVE LOST U TOO HIM...

WELL IF HE GIVES U HAPPINNES AND I DON'T... IT'S UR CHOICE..

I DIDN'T EXPECT IT TO BE U BRO..... AFTER ALL LIKE I SAY I SUCK RITE.... MY OWN BRO.... ARH...

LOOKS LIKE I AM A FOOL.... WELL DONE... PICTURES SAY ALOT...

FUCKING LOSER
SHAFIK....
AKA ALSO KNOW AS UR BRO

2008-05-25T09:05:00.000-07:00

life has been sucky! "

i just can't get what the fuck i want la..."

it's because shafik is GOOD FOR NOTHING..

he's fat, stupid, let others take advantage of him.. and he can't just get Little things he wants..

i really like u la.. i did want i can even tho i can't... i have not done it to many girls.. and i just want u to be happy.. looks like SHAFIK CAN'T....

really thanks for all the smile u brought to me... it's Will be memories to me..

life still goes on for me..

shafik
stupid ass.

2008-05-24T10:29:00.000-07:00

WHAT SHOULD I DO?

GO FOR IT ANOT?

SHAFIK!

2008-05-17T03:58:00.000-07:00

i just feel shock abt the incident of my cadets death.. well i just got me thinking abt it.. i mean he's my cadet and although i don't know him well it just got me sadden.. haiz.. why?! i really have no mood to do anything at all..

well boy, u just be happy where ever u are.. i will pray for u... and i hope u had a Good time in NPCC, hope the game we had during camps and sec 1 swearing in were the times u enjoyed.take care...(Shafik Sir)

SHAFIK

2008-04-20T08:21:00.000-07:00

well it's been some time since i have wrote something on the blog..

everthing have been so messed up..

i feell we are not close anymore. is either i am at falut or it's just that u guys don't undersand me anymore.. when u need help i am there. i will be the one calling u ppl.. have u all do that? i justdon't get it.. i just scared of losing our friendship..hope u al understand. i am sorry i would love to meet up.. but work have been too taxing for me.. that i have hardly time for u guys or my family..

SORRY

rafael and edwin sorry i am too busy that i got no time to meet up.. i am here always.. promised..

too someone i like.. well i wish i can just meet u but u have always been turning me down.. why?? am i that bad? i like u.. i won't give up chasing u till i am turn down flat by u.. by face to face... i am waiting..

shafik

2008-04-07T06:41:00.000-07:00

Mr Thomas, East Spring Students and Mr Shafik!!

Gay moment of care teachers.. opps i meant me.. hahaha

my Outram Students and Plmgss Student.. proud of my students.. three of them did well.. and congrats pl for being the most impact project.

2008-02-26T21:32:00.000-08:00

dear campcraft team,

i am proud of both the teams,
your effort and hard training with me are all being paid off..
i had a wonderful time training u all
and lets hope the best for the result..

CI(NPCC)Shafik
St Gabriel's Secondary School
Secondary Four In-charge
Campcraft Ic

P.S

to all those who help in the training and making it happen the last min, I WANT TO THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR TIME AND EFFORT..

Jasmine, weiwen,Jaime
appreciate what u have done..
i think without ur help i don't think my guys would have perform that well..
and would have been a loser during the comp..
A treat is a mst from st gabriel's.

2008-02-11T17:09:00.000-08:00

I've been tagged.Rules of the game:

Each player of this game starts off with ten weird things or habits or little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged must write in a blog of their own ten weird things or habits or little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end you must choose six people to be tagged and list their names. No tag backs!

1. I tend to stare at people and get angry when they stare back. (so don't stare at me)

2. when i got nothing to do i rub or shake my tummy..

3. i don't like to hurt people feelings when i am angry with them..

4. I always dream to be a soccer coach.. (mad)

5.i snore when i sleep.. wahahahaha..

6. i love to make people laugh but all my jokes are all dirty..

7. i have a PHD in Vulgarities

8. i hate stingray.. (because that stupid creature kill steve ewin) wahahaha

9. i hate my sister cooking and father, cause i cook better.. wahaahaha

10. I AM NOT A GAY!!! I LIKE GIRLS...( sorry chia wee..)

You've been tagged.

buddy van's
balqis
jeremy

knn i damn long never do this thing la.. wtf

shafik
fat one

2008-02-11T03:44:00.000-08:00

hellooooo world...

GUESS WHAT I LOST MY FUCKING WALLET.. AND ALL MY MONEY ARE IN IT AND BEST OF ALL MY IC....

it's like what the fuck la..

and thks for running ur mouth like a bastard..

thanks evan buddy for cheering me up and all,.,
and i hope u are feeling better.. remember to take ur medicine..
or esle the formal doctor will have too see u again.. hahaha

buddy and me.. wahahah

shafik
fat one

2008-01-31T09:22:00.000-08:00

AM I SCARED OF BEING RUN BY SOMEONE?

I HAVE THIS FEELING THAT BEING RUN BY SOMEONE IS A BAD THING.. WHY?
I HAVE ALWAYS SEEN MYSELF LEADING PEOPLE AND MY CADETS.. BUT WHEN THEY RUN ME I FEEL LIKE A LOSER.. THAT'S VERY BAD.. TOO ME LA.. WELL PEOPLE READING THIS WE HUMAN HAVE OUR OWN POINTS OF VIEW.. SO DEAL WITH IT THAT'S MY POINT.. I KNOW I HAVE TO CHANGE MY STYLE OF WORKING BUY IT'LL TAKE TIME.. HAIZ..

WHY DID I CHOSE TO RETURN?? SEE I AM FACING THIS PROBLEM.. FUCKALANDO!!

DO U SEE ME AS WHAT I SEE YOU?
WHY CAN'T WE WORK THINGS OUT?
I AM JEALOUS WHEN YOUR ARE WITH OTHER GUYS OR TALK ABOUT THEM..
ALTHOUGH WE ARE NOT TOGETHER I AM SAYING IT OUT LOUD I DO HAVE FEELING FOR YOU!!

ARHHH FUCK IT LA.. LIKE BLOG WILL HELP..

SHAFIK
BORN A LEADER DIE A FOLLOWER

2007-11-11T07:02:00.000-08:00

why do people see the bad side of me then the good!

I don't get the fact that there is a different between me and other guys..

What they are better looking then me?

What because they are SMALLER then me the fat asshole..

Come on la. i really don't see the fucking differences.. Unless you girls are scared to go out with guys like me.. fuck it la.. I don't know why i am getting pissed.. but i want to let it out.. arhhhhhhhhhhhhh... cannot take it liao..

every fucking girl i like will always tend to stray away or pretend not to know me.. GOD YOUR PLANS FOR ME HAVE FINALLY COME TRUE.. it's not worth it to talk to you la.. you just too selfish and don't know how to make things fair for people like me.. making me suffer it's not so bad but making the people that i love suffer, THAT'S FUCK.. I really don't know why your doing this to me but i really had enough.. I WANT TO FEEL LOVE NOT BEING LEFT OUT... YOU GET IT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I AM TOTALLY PISSED NOW..

the person how lost faith in god

SHAFIK

BUT

I AM HAPPY TO HAVE FRIENDS LIKE THEM!

HAPPY THREE FRIENDS!

2007-08-20T09:04:00.000-07:00

I've Lost The Battle Of Love!

what a joke i have been made of.. only to realise that i have been made a fool..
i have never lost in a game but i have to say i lost this time round. and lost badly. i never reflected about it so much and eventually cried about it in the bus.. it hurts so much and i can't stop thinking about it.. what a loser i am! waited so long for you.. is it worth it.. tell me?!

HOW FAR WILL YOU GO JUST TO BE WITH HER OR THE ONE YOU LOVE?

Freaking loser
shafik

2007-07-28T09:28:00.000-07:00

edwin finally did it!

well this song have really made me thinking of pently of things.. which also i don't know how explain it.. just listen and fell the impactness..

westlife- The Rose

The Rose lyrics by Westlife.

Some say love it is a river

that drowns the tender reed

Some say love it is a razor

that leaves your soul to bleed

Some say love it is a hungeran endless aching need

I say love it is a flower

and you it's only seed

It's the heart afraid of breaking

that never learns to dance

It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance.

It's the one who won't be taken

who cannot seem to give

and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely

and the road has been too long

and you think that love is only

for the lucky and the strong

Just remember in the winter

far beneath the bitter snows

lies the seedthat with the sun's lovein the spring

becomes the rose!

WELL after listening to it u might fell emo.. it's normal people.

for now i gtg amd emo..

BYE

shafik

2007-07-21T23:16:00.000-07:00

2007-07-21T22:38:00.000-07:00

CARE ANNIVERSARY

WELL IT'S WAS 17/07/07. THE DAY WHERE I HAD TO GIVE MY SPEECH TO THE "PRESIDENT OF SINGAPORE"

honestly i was really very nervous about it.. okay.. 12pm Nicholas and i headed to Hyatt hotel.. we had to pack the goodies bag and i had to practice my speech.. but when i headed there things change we pack the gives and i had to be interview by the newspaper reporter.. English, Malay, and yea CHINESE!
i felt like a star for once. i was in like a suit and i dare say i look smart!

Thomas, shu ee, suraya was also being interview..

the came to the moment where i had to make my speech after suraya..
i when up and just crack one joke! they laugh man.. shocking. after that i just began talking and ppl laugh and i believe the msg i wanted to tell manage to deliver to the rest..

after the dinner almost everyone thank me and motivated me to move on with life and change other teens..

i have decided to do it.. CHANGING TEENS IS MY TASK NOW!

here's the photo i took while i was giving my speech to the president and some other nice pic by the press..

for now tata

shafik

2007-07-01T07:28:00.000-07:00

OK I'M HERE UPDATING CAUSE I WAS BEING FORCE BY(BALQIS)!

well my life have been pretty good la.. have been seeing the champions lately, cause i'm working with care in mr nick team.. so eventually i have to go St Gabriels and Anderson.. had lots of fun. never laugh so much before.. well it's rare la.

but i'm only helping out for 2 weeks so that i can pay for the CARE anniversery dinner.. oh ya i'm making a speech for the the dinner and the president will be present.. and that like so a dream come true for me la.. president leh? how rare u can let him know wat were u like before..
so i'm greatful that care gave me the chance.. THANK YOU~!

well nothing much i have done yet.. so nothing to update( take note) haha.. looking forward to 17/07/07 for the dinner..

that's for now.

SHAFIK!

enjoy talking to u anjasmara:)

2007-06-10T19:09:00.000-07:00

MISSING YOU ALL!

todays atc and i'm not looking forward to it.. it's not going to be as fun as anderson camp. and plus i don't want to leave for camp.. i just wanna to sit at home and just chat with them.. the laughter they can give me is so PRICELESS.. but never the less i still have too. i will give my best to the camps that i'm going. ONE MORE WEEK TO GO AND IT'S OVER..

well yesterday all the champions met up with MR nick and hong qi and nicholas tay.. it was one hell of a day.. fun fun fun and nothing else.. we ate at food republic and play arcared and play water and took photo..to see the smile on each face iss so nice .. it's like all my problems are all gone for the moment.. and to expect kelvin ong engoying himself.. that's one guy i respect alot.. has change not much but who cares. as long he took the effort to change.. i'm proud of him.. and the rest too.. well ppl i have to rush for camp.. i will be back soon.. hehe. miss ya..

2007-06-07T19:55:00.000-07:00

CHAMPIONS!

That was my group in Anderson synergy camp 2007!

not actually my group la. but i combine the two groups together and became their facilitator..

day 1

i was in charge of group 8(AST), man i had lots of stress in that group la. out of six people in that group all of them smoke la. i was eventually got stress when all of them when off to smoke.. but then things work out slightly better after lunch.. i was a Little happy la.. then came the night part where we all had to go for the candle game. i felt that my group ast was very boring so i camp out with a plan to merge the group with group 10.. i the ask Mr Nick and he agree.. :) MAN i tell u that all of the were freaking happy la.. they all became high and started to cheer as one and scolding each other FUCK you bodoh.. ha ha and BAPAK kau.. i could feel the energy in them..so after that game the all were asking me whether they can merge.. so i promise them i would try asking Mr nick.. so that's was something about first day..
learning point for me: it's never too tough if you thing it's tough.

Day2 ( Bishan park/ campfire)

Morining came and we met up at the hall.. i had good news for the both groups as they were now formally merge throughout the camp..
they all were happy la. could see on their faces..:)we walk to bishan park.. had our breakfast there.. after breakfast we were set off to play our station games.
First game was dog and bone.. it was pretty OK la. not too bad.. could see they are trying..
Second game was the water game la.. man that was the best game.. they were like splashing water at Mr Ben and each other la.
they could not border about the game and just attacking one another.. they all became high man super active..
Third game was walking on the stone.. eventually the lost the game to the sec1 they were like "ah why care it's only a game what.."
i just like their attitude man..
after that game i allow them to buy drinks and snacks before heading to the next station.. while heading there hong qi stop us and wanted to hear our group cheer.
we didn't have a group cheer la but i came out with one..
it goes like this.. "when ast goes marching here, when ast goes marching here, we gonna so all of our POWER POWER POWER,when ast goes marching here..
and we had 500point for cheering.. i was so happy la. they all were so on about earning lots of points..
they wanted to cheer and cheer it again and earn as many points as they could.. we eventually did.
fourth game was Frisbee. we was so high that we won all the games.. first was 3-0 second was 2-0. we rock man..
at that point of time i felt that we all have bonded a lot and having fun.. it was lunch and we ate and joke and call ourselves CHAMPIONS..
cause i was tell the whole camp that my group was a champion. we trash everyone flat.. ha ha
after all the fun were walk back to school and got ready for the next game battle of the tale (i think la).. my group people were all so tired and could not go on..
but i told them we have to win this and we eventually did.. at the first part of the game we were losing.
we left only 2 balls, the last 2mins i told them a plan and the did as what i told them. AND GUESS WHAT WE HAD 7 BALLS AND WE WERE WINNER! WOO
then i was wash up and prepare for camp fire.. although they did not came out with any thing i help them with a 2mins show..
we sang my fav song the Banana song and did out cheer with action.. and the bapak kau.. hahaha..
the second day was a great day for me as i see they were having fun..

Day 3(the moment of sadness)

i won' go to detail about the activity. cause all the same as we had to do area cleaning..
but i would like to focus on one point that really impacted me. is when i brought them down to talk to them for the last time about me being really happy about them.
and telling them that to go on with life on matter what happen and that they were the bets group i have ever taken..
as the rest of the facilitator say their point i eventually cry as it was sad that we have to end this fun camp after bonding so much.. i just cried and they were like "come on shafik don't cry. it's OK"
i stop crying and we head to the hall where we played uno! i suck in that game.. i lost and had to do push up.. Ha..
then came the presentation of the prizes.. kelvin ong won the individual prize.. happy for that guy.. then our group won too.. then came the part where Anderson team sang "flying without wings"
the lyric really touch me as it had meaning to what had happen to my group.. we all held hand and just started saying our goodbyes.. as i was going round i saw many of them crying ans sad that we had to end it..
i just could not stop crying man. i just cried and cried till Thomas and Jame brought me one Conner and clam me down.. is stop and i had to rush to LMSC.. so i took my bag and said bye to them.
they all stood up and hug me.. i have never felt that bond with them.. i just love everyone of them too much.. they all cried again.. we did our cheer the last time..as i was in the cab heading the i was crying.. I'm starting to miss them all.. till now too..

CHAMPIONS: here is something i want to tell you..
the camp may have ended but our friendship have not.. I'm always there for you no matter what.. I PROMISE!
STUDY HARD AND EXCEL IN WHAT YOU ALL DO!
LOVE U ALL!:)

SHAFIK BIN MOHD SAID
FACILITATOR OF GROUP CHAMPIONS

2007-05-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

I've have something to say.. I'm going to take lots of guts to freaking say it..

Today as i was in bus 81heading home there were some SAJC girls behind me.. they were saying things that got me sort of hurt.. i mean that if u wanna run Ur mouth about me, don't do it in front of me.. hello i can hear u bitch.

try having the body that i have.. i suffer 18 fucking long years with what i got.. you think i enjoy it.. i try all my best to prevent it man.. i have done Wat ever i can.. shit i even did research on it la.. if i have $5000 i would go for surgery and take the out Wat ever that causing it.. you all know want the reason why i feel more comfortable hanging out with guy around me is because i can't bring myself to face girls with my BO!! I'm really sad why god have to select me to have it.. i maybe happy but i feel uncomfortable with myself.. and people telling me off really hurt me.. i don't have a choice

bros this is something i have to say the reason why I'm still single.. is because of this.. hope u get it.. i can't bring myself to tell u.. SORRY

2007-03-31T21:45:00.000-07:00

i want you back..

SECONDARY THREE!

HERE ARE THE CAMP CRAFT RESULT..
THOSE FAILED THE TEST OR NEVER GET IT U WILL HAVE TO RE-TAKE!

Secondary 3 Campcraft Test Result.
Campcraft test was held on the 07/02/2007
Instructor conducting the test: CI (NPCC) Shafik Bin Mohd Said
PASS

1
Daryl Foo Yong Cheun
3 E2

2
Jaron Lim
3 E2

3
Leong Kit Fei
3 E3

4
Tang Yong Quan
3 E3

5
Benedict Ong
3 E5

6
Khairul Ikhwan
3 E6

7
Tan Jia Yang
3 N1

8
Hasiim
3 N1

9
Allister foo
3 N1

10
Issac Siow
3 N2

11
Hoi Zhi Pin
3 N3

12
Andreas Yip
3 T1

13
Rahul Kumar
3 T1

14
Oliver Siow
2 N1

15
Yusof
3 N2

16
Christopher
2 N2

The names that are not stated on this result has failed the test. There will be re-test. Date will have to be yet comfirm.
Done by: CI(NPCC) Shafik Bin Mohd Said.

THAT'S ALL..

CI SHAFIK

2007-03-21T09:36:00.000-07:00

WAH AT LAST I CAN LOGIN TO THIS FUCKING ACCOUNT.. KNNBCCB.. HAHA JUST LEARN..

WELL LATELY MANY THINGS HAS HAPPEN TO ME I JUST CAN LET IT OUT. I'M SCARED TO HURT THEIR FEELINGS OR JUST MAKE OUR FRIENDSHIP SOUR..

i use to like this girl lately and i guess we were close u can say so.. and things got worst lately. i don't know why but it's just maybe she finds me a jerk or just think i suck.. i really hope that u can be honest to me and not treat me coldly.. we can still be friends.. and i hope u have happeiness in your new relationship.. and me still lonely.. it's ok..

and then come to the person i thought that i can start working with or communicate with better.. but things got out of hand.. WHY? cause that person began ruling me in wat i do or say.. ah i feel fuck up when i talk abt it but i can only vain my anger on thing f***ing blog.. tsk i really hope u realise la.. i'm getting pissed of this..

and last but not least i have been call a wussy ci cause i was care by my oc to take this waiteress number and i didn't dare so i was called a wussy.. haha.. and my oc sabo me to take picture with her..

haha ok this is lame but fun la..

ok gtg

SHAFIK

2007-02-05T21:43:00.000-08:00

LOST OF WORDS

For some reason i've really got nothing to say at all.. gosh.

i'm in the state of shockness OF WHAT I'VE SAW.

it really got me thinking..

stop dreaming! get on with life!

but then come to think,

i've wasted my time wating for things happen the right way but it ended up the wrong way!.

so i really have to,

STOP DREAMING AND MOVE ON!

DREAMER!

SHAFIK

2007-02-03T02:26:00.000-08:00

IT'S TIME TO GIVE UP!!

i don't know whether to give up on two thing in my life.

i don't know whether i should give up on my ci-ship.. things in the unit have gone bad to worst.. it makes me feeling all the problem being with me. am i the cause of it?! pls i really want to be have a good memories in the unit as a ci. the sad thing to hear is that my oc is willing to sack all of the ci for yuan long.. i have put my trust on him, i respected him and this is his solution to solvin the ci politics.. lets hope things work out well after the meeting we all had yesterday or i willing to leave the unit to make thing happier.

~~i have decided to give up on u tho.. maybe wat u told me is very true.. not fated means not fated.. hope u can find your happiness!~~

shafik

2007-01-22T07:49:00.000-08:00

CONFUSE,SAD AND LONELY!

THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY ABT MY FEELINGS.. Y THE PPL I LOVE BEHAVE THIS WAY??

PLS GIVE ME A CHANCE!

SHAFIK

2007-01-18T11:40:00.000-08:00

SAD BASTARD!

after watching the movie coach carther,it got me think alot.. abt wat i will be when i'm big. not as in size but age~hahah! and thing like me being a failure in life like that bastard(dad).. the more i don't want to be like him i will tend to be like him.. fuck sia! haiz.. i eventually cried in my room once i reach home.. i broke too tears! i have not cried for a long time man.. the last time i cried was 27/07/06! it's like man.. i was really ~EMO~! that show really got me thinking and crying.. i msg two ppl abt it.. and i think wat they say is very true.. if i don't want to be like him, i've to work hard as not to like him.. thks

but today i got another thinking.. i'm confuesed!!

i don't know what i'm feeling.. arh i'm just confuse!

maybe love sick?! hhehehe

or even missing someone??

or even abt myself??

i don't.. but what do u think?

well that's all shafik got for u all..

so shafik out!

2007-01-10T20:05:00.000-08:00
A Moment Like This

i wish i will have this moment like this.. y i say that is cause i have always bee the target of them since i came back as a CI.. i want to have the moment of not being shot at or being able to lead and be like a ci.. not a stupid nco or cadet.. and wat personal life i have outside it got nothing to np. as long i'm able to draw a line between np and outside lfe.. the blacks will never leave me and bro alnoe.. we are like the target brothers.. you not happy shoot us?? fuck u understand.. i was not born to be your target man BLACKIES!

funking pek cek..

shafik

2007-01-08T19:41:00.000-08:00

hey it's been a long time since i blog abt my feelings.. haiz

today i would say that i have lots of things to let go.. so bare with me..

things that have been running through such as, why am i even a ci?? and why must my stupid mouth say things that make two ppl shock!!

haiz.. when i come to a thinking that whether i'm a usefull ci it always give me that feeling i'm not needed in the unit or even in the core.. having my style of leadership it's simple many ppl can learnt.. so it is sad for me too see that my fucking unit not giving me task to do at all.. i'm only in charge of the sec3.. and i don't even have to do a single shit abt it.. i don't even have to plan for their NCO course, jnoc course, to build their leadership in them and lots of more things.. haiz wat the purpose of putting me in-charge.. the reason why i'm alway not wanting to help hq is because i'm afraid of being laugh at.. i told izwan(area 5 ci and squadmate) before that if i go for npdp i scared that the ppl there would laugh at me due to the image of me in ci course.. they would have the thought that " wah shafik want to join npdp huh? his drills suck! and he still want to join" haiz that the reason y i'm always not wanting to help in hq.. i don't feeling like talking abt this already.. anyway IZWAN thks for listening to me and encouraging me to go npdp.. and thks bros for listening to me too..

yesterday i told someone abt the way i felt for her.. i mean i was just beeing honest and open abt it, i really didn't mean to make u feel shock. like wat i told u this is one of the reason y i choose not to tell u.. i'm scared our friendship would end here.. even tho we know each other for sometime only.. i guess the only thing i can do now is just shut my mouth and not say a thing.. well i' sorry to make u feel ths way and spoling ur day.. so sorry..

well tHAT all the big guy have to say..

shafik!

2006-12-22T18:39:00.000-08:00
hey!

there's many things i have to say..

1. obbd( outward bound brunei)
2. things that have been running my mind..

OBBD

wah.. this is the toughest course i have ever been too..
life was totally different..i hardly have anyone to talk or crap with.. so i can say i was a loner..
so the first three days i was really very ON in doing things.. volunter in doing stuff and being the leader of the group for the first day.. so yeah.. but after a week i began to slack.. cause my group member are taking advantage of me. as in asking me to do stuff for them and not volunteering at all.. then i was really piss off and during the debrief i shoot at all of them.. hah. the feling was fucking shiok.. haha.. i won't say all only 2 singaporeans and most of the bruneians.. fyi i have 15 ppl in my group..8 s'pore and 7 brunie..

so then come to tracking!

man i cry while making my where to the final check point..
i cry not cause i m tired i cry due to i had fever abt 38.5. and i just had too break down.. i can't even lift my bag pack.. my whole body were jelly.. so my insturctor told me to carry on and not give up just like that.. so i really tried my best to move on till we reach the final checkpoint.. when we reach theri knock-out.. man felt like shit..

after hiking we had kyaking then had abselling.. wah that one my balls when up my throat.. i was freaking scared.. but made it tho..

oh then we had to run 7km.. fuck. i hate running and i still have to run.. i manage to complete it less than 40 mins.. fucking cool i didn't even stop at all..

well i really miss there.. all the ppl there and my best instructor RAFFI!!

The second part..

well things have been running in mind..

i feel so useless.. it's sad too see myself no achieving in many things i have been doing..
i don't know how to explain la.. if you want to know ask me la..

plus i'm scared that my buddy change to be a diffre person person.. i understand you will change but not that much.. lets hope you don't change and be your old self..

well i fucking piss with lots of ppl for backstabbing me la so yeah don't really wanna talk..

bb

shafik

2006-11-23T19:08:00.000-08:00
hey been a long time since i blog..

there is something i would like to share with you all! it's a song that i have been touch or make me move on with life! some of you all have heard of this song and find it as another song.. but listen to the lyrics.. you will understand.. the sond is Joey McIntyre - Stay the same

the lyrics

Chorus:

Dont you ever wish
You were someone else
You were meant to be
The way you are exactly
Dont you ever say
You dont like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself
Youre better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
Cause theres nothing bout you I would change
I think that you could be
Whatever you wanted to be
If you could realize
All the dreams you have inside
Dont be afraid
If youve got something to say
Just open up your heart
And let it show you the way

Chorus

Believe in yourself
Reach down inside
The love you find will set you free
Believe in yourself
You will come alive
Have faith in what you do
Youll make it through

Chorus
Dont change...
___________________________________

as you ppl view or listening to the song. all i have to say i would prefer you as wat you are.. i wonld not want to change you cause i think ok not think but m sure that your the best in wat way you are..

during the campfire i sang this song and i hope the cadets have really been touch cos i want them to know the are perfcet in their own way..

take me for example i have been rejected but so many ppl.. and i have always wanted to be like my friends who have no problem with anything at all... and as l hear this song, my thinking have change.. so i hope you ppl have done some thinking and soul serching..

shafik

2006-11-04T20:12:00.000-08:00
shila
i could see the fake smile on your face.. i know the pain your feeling my dear! i pity you, for being force to do wat you don't like.. but maybe it's for your own good. well i will pray for you to have the happiness you will have in the pass years to come!!poor you..

hmm i guess wat you say is true.. we are drifting apart and i hate the feeling of this.. maybe we are just not mend for each other.. i guess wat my friend told me i can't forces love and that one to like me.. i had enough of heart break and rejections.. do my forehead state " reject this bastard"!! and i think wat my mum say is true wait for them to come to you not you seek for them.. and you can't seek for love, but love happen when you don't even notice it at all! is it true?? well let it be tho.. ya my main thing now is studies.. i can't affort to not to have a decent job and not support my mum, and if i were to have a family i can't affort not to support them too! so school here i come.. but i really wonder wat i would be when i grow up??

i hate myself for being like this..

2006-11-03T17:27:00.000-08:00
heeeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllooooooooooooo! ok i'm crazy..

well i just talk to one of my female classmate on the phone today, and the shocking part is that she getting married on the 4 nov! what the fuk man! you marry before the one(shafik).. hah kidding.. but really she only 17 this year and she getting married?? siao.. ok i talk to her and ask her WHY SO EARLY MARRY? her reply was "i was being force by my parents.they say thaT i would have no future due to my studies.. and they have found me a guy whom can support me for good"! poor shila.. i pity her, so what if your in ITE, it's not the end of our life jornary? we willl be able to find a proper jobs and support ourself.. YES. our pay maybe little but at least we have a proper job.. sometime i hate to have parents controling our lifes? this is marriage we are talking abt! we can force one if the one doesn't wants to marry.. it's going to a burden for her. plus she don't even like that guy she marrying.. of cause la got better guys like me! lame.. all i can do now is wish her all the best and pray for her to have a wonderfull life.. but remember shila i would always be here for you! if he bullies you i whack him until he mati sial! sad one of our clique is gone!

well for me i'm perfectly A-OK! things at home getting better , school's fine, friends i don't know.. well sian la blogging i would only blogg if i have things to say.. i don't really blog abt my day, but i blog abt my feelings..ok la gtg.. bb

congrats to the both of you.. may you find happiness.. and we seem to be fadding away more! why?

shafik

2006-10-31T08:19:00.000-08:00
well all i can say i m lost or i can't even think at all.. wtf

2006-10-25T07:42:00.000-07:00
i would transtlate the two post i wrote in malay..

wednesday, oct 18

today is the day that i would not forget, cause i feel that there is 2 ladys i love and like in this world.. but i feel that the second lady don't have feelings me. i feel that i just plain stupid or not needed in this world.. well watever it is i would respect her decision or wats she wants..
______________________________________________________________
monday, 23 oct

i feel so blind for wasting my fucking time on waiting for you.. and you have been playing my heart.. well wat a waste..

well watever happens just let it be..
_______________________________________________

and here's today one..

the reason why i blog in malay is because i feel that i can relate my feeling better and not cause any misunderstanding.. i don't want things to be like wat happen after the 27 july.. so i would rather hurt myself than others.. i can't effort our friendship to end just because of wat i wrote.. so hope you guys understand if i blog in malay.. but i guess i won't tho..

shafik

2006-10-23T08:09:00.000-07:00
well i just got one thing to say!!!

saya rasa saya sangat buta untuk tunguh kan kamu.. dan kamu bermain degan h*** saya.. wat a waste..

well apa yang terjadi saya akan biarkan..

that all.. dan saya ucapkan kepada semua mulismat SELAMAT HARI RAYA!

SHAFIK!!

2006-10-21T07:01:00.000-07:00

harlow!!!!!
the past few days i have been doing lots of stupid stuff and i DYE MY HAIR. =)
but i have to dye it back to black due to the area 20 atc.. must be an example of a good CI. what a waste..

today i finally when out with my long lost buddy in np.. HANLONG!! my gay buddy since sec3.. lol. kidding . just that we do wat ever each other does.. sound gay?? really had fun time with him.. today also met up with xt, fishy, rafael, and my gay buddy "hanlong" . the three guy went to the park first we play those stupid thingy. don't know wat that thing call. then i found a stick and start whacking hanlong with it.. man damn funny he shout like girls and raf was just sitting there laughing or don't know do wat.. haha.. later the women join us and we started throwing stones at each other and like wise i'm always the victim. hanlong, fishy and ma'am were like throwing at me.. but overall i had fun.. thanks ppl for today..

things that happen the past few days!
i have already moved back home at hougang! it's suckss.. i feel like killing that bastard(dad)..
i bought a fucking nice baju kurung
rafael got into cibtc. i'm so happy for him.. i respect him for waiting so long, 1 long fucking year leh.. but bro i will pary that nothing happen along the way!!
my mum is getting sick.. i don't wat anything to happen to her.. if there were to be anything i won't forgive myself..
i have to decide whether i want to take o's or remain in the most boring school ITE..
my life have been super messy.. i don't know wat to do??
last one i don't feel like saying.. ppl might get the wrong idea..
well thats all i got for now.. tata..

shafik aka the one..

2006-10-18T05:38:00.000-07:00
ok today i shall blog in malay.. so if don't understand fuck it.. haha. nah just ask me la..ok but if your understand mine is fuck up malay.. sorry..

hari adalah hari yang saya tak akan lupa.
kerana saya rasa ada dua orang wanita yang i sayang.. tetapi i rasa mereka tak da rasa kepada saya.. sigh.. macam i orang bodoh atau orang yang tak guna kepada dunia ini.. tapi saya akan hormatkan apa yang mereka nak.. ok this is so MAT.. HAHA

AT LAST I GOT THE FEELING OUT.. haha

ask me if you want to know..

shafik (mat)

2006-10-09T22:20:00.000-07:00

So lately, I've been wonderin
Who will be there to take my place
When I'm gone, you'll need love
To light the shadows on your face
If a great wave should fall
It would fall upon us all
And between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own
[Chorus:]
If I could,
then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'llgo wherever you will go
And maybe, I'll find out
The way to make itback someday
To watch you,to guide you
Through the darkest of yourdaysIf
a great wave should fallIt would fall upon us all
Well I hopethere's someone out there
Who can bring me back toyou
[Chorus]
Runaway with my heart
Runaway with myhope
Runaway with my love
I know now,
just quite how
My life andlove might still go on
In your heart and your mindI'll stay with you forall of time
[Chorus]
If I could turn back time
I'll gowherever you will go
If I could make you mine
I'll go wherever you willgo

haha.. i'm stuck with this song.. hehe..
by the way the past few days i have been ok la.. things in wols seem to die.. want to know ask me.. i don't wish to write about this on my fucking blog.. friends around me seems like fading away.. y?? what i did wrong to deserve this treatmeant? maybe i suck i guess!
thanks for those ppl whom belive in me all this while.. you know who r you.. ya.
hari raya is coming soon and my family hardly done anything. things like bake cake and cookies plus clean the bloody house..
haiz.. later work.. ok la thats all i got to say..
shafik hunk

2006-10-02T07:32:00.000-07:00
wah at last i m blogging..haha.. ok la many things have happen that i can't even blog.. plus no com la..

hmm let me start with my life,
i'm doing pretty well. getting more hunk=)
i m lost, as in i don't know wat i m doing at all..
i feel i m leading my father footsteps and i going to be a failure like him. sigh
plus currently i have lost faith in god,cause 19 years my mum have suffer and nothing has change.. he has not help us to a better life but worst??why my family.. and y must we suffer with my dad?? u see if ur in my shoes u will understand why i lost faith in god.. but where is him when i need him? ya that wat i feel la..
after yesterday i talk to you i realise that you have no specail feeling for me.. it is ok in the river there is many fishes..

updated abt my family!

my mum just open a company.. a karang guni.. so i m helping out.. =)
people may think that it's a dirty jod but it make easy money.. haha
wat to do i got money face wat!! haha kidding..

my mum is still fighting out with my dad in court.. but i still don't know why my mum wants to forgive him??
does she has the feeling for him?? after wat he did to her for 19 fucking long years??
well that he problem i don't give a fuck anymore.. ya

wat else?? ya i was blogging and i saw ppl wishing chloe happy birthday.. so HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY CHLOE.. although i don't really know you.. but since you tagg my blog i shall wish you then.. ya your weird leh?? see me and rafael you like see ghost.. haha..

ok la i m fucking tired la wanna sleep and go work later so good nitez!

shafik
the hunk

2006-09-10T03:15:00.000-07:00
it's been awhile seen i blog i guess.. many things happen lately too..plus i m not home yet still staying with aunty so cannot use com la.. sian leh.. but to keep me entertain is my nephew and work.. cool.. there's so much to say that i don't where to start.. well maybe another time?? i now very tired and confuse.. so later..

shafik

ithink i have the thing for you?? but i guess you don't.!

2006-08-20T09:45:00.000-07:00

SAY SAY SAY.. lately i have been having lots of problem at home.. parent fighting, hope that fucking beast(faher) die of and accident and die.. really if that day happen i will be the most happiest guy on earth.. plus lots of things have been on my fucking mind.. school fees, problem at home, the ppl i owe money and one more thing that i won't say at all.. how am i going to settle this.. i am a bum leh.. alway having this type of problem..why must i suffer?? why huh?? isit i did something wrong before.. haiz i have to face it la..
i m not fated to have any good life..

well i would like to thank rafael and xiaoting for being there listening what i have to say this past few days for hell for me.. currently i m staying at rafael house cause my family ran away from home.. so i decide to stay at raf house cause i hate staying with my aunt la.. thanks bro for all the help you been helping me all this while.. i owe u alot mann.. i really don't what to say at all..
i m bless to have friends like you two. i can only say thanks..

well that all i have to say for now.. lets hope everything is fine and my fucking dad die this week..

shafik

2006-08-14T07:49:00.001-07:00
Yo i'm back to blogging.. well many things have happen lately.. things like wols having a wonderful birthday party, problem with poeple??, and i caught two of mine cadet smoking!

first things first, the birthday party... i'm so sorry for those people who i didn't call and sort of play u guy out.. this party was for wols only.. pls understand! ok.. as for the party ok not really party its more like bbq, it was ok la i find it a boring one really.. sorry! but i feel that if u wanna to have a great party all should have the mood to be high and learnt to mix around with others..but the party was ok la at the end. i manage to laugh a little.. and i manage to play rockets.. but listen up WOLS to make the group flame still burning, i want all of u wolsies to mix around and share what ever problem you have in this group. don't keep it inside your heart, nothing will be slove.. pls i want this wols thingy to last.. i can't do it alone i need u people to play your part.. k??

and the sad thing that happen today was that i caught two of mine sec2 cadet smoking.. i m really sad and i feel so useless and a big time loser!!all i wanted of them was not to be like me. "for your infor i use to be a somker drinker,ganster and i did what ever bad things u can think of".. the fact wats i don't want them to lead to my old path.. i want them to be someone out there.. not a loser like me.. please people help yourself..

well all the past was the past.. i want to forget about it and move on and change them..

thats all i have for now..

bb

shafik

2006-08-02T20:18:00.000-07:00

hey at last i m blogging haha.. well i have been doing lots of lame shit lately.. if u want to know ask me i don't write lame things on my blog.. ha.. ya just ask me k?? well i have been ponning sch.. the reason is sian la.. ha.. so i have to get rid of the bad habit!!

i am so happy thing have gone back to the way it was before.. and the things that i have to say is that i m confuse.. ya that all

SHAFIK

2006-07-30T22:17:00.000-07:00
mann jonathan rock.. hear this.

shafik

2006-07-28T07:43:00.000-07:00

THIS IS MINE FIRST TIME LOST OF WORDS AS I M WRITTING MY DAILY BLOG.. MAN!
WHAT I REALLY WANT TO SAY IS THAT I HAVE GOTTAN OVER IT AND I DON'T REALLY WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT..
REALLY!!..
POEPLE HAVE TOLD ME NOT TO GIVE UP, AND SOME TOLD ME GIVE UP LA!
BUT I HAVE ALREADY MADE UP MY MIND, THE ANSWER IS I HAVE ALREADY GIVEN UP..
CAUSE ONE HAVE TO MAKE ONE HAPPY!
I WANT TO BE THE ONE TO MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE AND DECISION FOR EVERYTHING I DO..
PLUS I DON'T WANT TO MAKE EVERYONE ANGRY,SAD OR ANYTHING UNPLEASENT..
I WANT TO MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY, AND STRESS FREE!=) HEHE.. YA.

HEY ALL I WANT YOU TO KNOW IS THAT I HAVE I HAVE GOTTAN OVER IT AND I FEEL HAPPIER.. SO LETS NOT THINK ABOUT IT.. I WANNA MOVE ON.. HAHA.

SHAFIK

2006-07-27T19:19:00.000-07:00
today i feel much more better from what i have been feeling the past few days. i took all mine guts to ask and the out come was wat i expected.. haha. i understood why and what was the reason.. so i was not sad or angry.. in fcat i was having this feeling of joy in me, cause i manage to say it out.."well there is more la to say but nah save it".. hehe.. but we all have to look at the bright sight, if we don't what can we gain from it? sadness? ya lor! or even life has to go on man! ok let drop this topic .

band concert was fucking great.. its one of the best performents i have ever seen them perform. the solo was excllent cause i teach them what..hah. plus i wanna thank sherina and her friend for coming to the concert with me.. and the poeple who was supported me in all ways!

the happy guy now!

shafik

2006-07-26T18:48:00.000-07:00
THE PAST TWO DAYS I BEEN FEELING VERY HAPPY AND SAD AT THE SAME TIME. THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT I WAS OFFER MINE AREOSPACE COURSE AGAIN.. MANN I M SO HAPPY...

NOW COME THE BAD PART.. THE REASON I SAD IS THAT I LOST THE FIGHT TO MINE CLASSMATE WHO TOOK MINE MONEY.. THE THE OUTCOME NOW IS THAT HE CAN TAKE HIS TIME TO PAY.. HAIZ I M A LOSER MAN.. PLUS I I M SORRY THAT I HAVE TO SMOKE TODAY.. ITS ONE OF THE RULE IN A FIGHT.. AND ITS GOING TO BE MINE LAST FIGHT EVEr again

THE HAPPY AND SAD GUY

SHAFIK

2006-07-21T20:18:00.000-07:00
mann this is funny.. hear it.. beware of bad word.. haha

2006-07-21T09:36:00.000-07:00
hey.. today has been a long day.. i was shoot during npcc tranning for lots of stuff.. m i fit to be a CI??, i have given up hope in the person i like.. haiz.. wat to do i m always creating trouble and ?? nvm i have no mood to write a thing.. well i give up on you.. that final..

but the best part i really wanna write is that i love mine sec2.. they have make me so proud.. the won the pl thingy!! man i love love love them.. is like i train them for 2 years and this is the out come.. man.. the have won all comp under me.. haha..thks sec2 for trying ur best.. raf thanks being there to motivate them and ya lots of thing..well and back to the first part i give up on you..

shafik

2006-07-18T21:25:00.000-07:00
HAIZ.. I M IN TROUBLE.. MINE FRIEND IN ITE TOOK ALL MINE MONEY AND RAN AWAY WITH IT.. THAT MONEY WAS TO PAY THE BOOKIE FOR WHAT I LOST IN THE FINAL.. SO NOW THE BOOKIE IS PESTERING ME FOR THE CASH.. I FEEL LIKE KILLING THE FRIEND OF MINE AND MYSELF.. BUT I WANNA TO THANK WHO HELP ME RAISE THE MONEY PPL LIKE DARREN, RAFAEL,TIMOTHY,RYAN AND LET HOPE MR KHOO CAN LEND ME $100.. WELL I REGRET BETTING NOW.. I M SO SORRY TO CAUSE THOSE PPL WHO HLEP ME OR TOLD ME NOT TO BET.. SO SORRY.. WAT M I TO DO NOW?? I M CASHLESS DUE TO MINE FRECKING CLASSMATE WHO PLAY ME OUT..I FEEL SO GUILTY NOW.. ALL I CAN DO NOW IS TO FIND FOR A WORK AND PAY THOSE PPL.. AND SAY SOORY AND THANKS FOR WILLING TO HELP ME... THANK YOU ALOT DARREN,RAFAEL FOR NOT LOSING HOPE IN ME AND TRYING ALL WAY TO HELP ME RASIE CASH.. WELL DURING ONE POINT I WANTED TO BORROW MONEY FROM LOAN-SHARK.T SEEM LIKE THE ONLY WAY OUT.. BUT DARREN HELP ME AND SCOLDED ME NOT TO GET MONEY FROM THEM.. MAN.. I MUST TREASURE HIM AND RAFAEL.. IF THEY WERE TO BE IN TROUBLE OR NEED ANY HELP I WILL HELP THEM IN WHAT EVER I CAN.. HAIZ..

WELL LETS HOPE I WILL BE ABLE TO RAISE $300.. YA

THKS ALOT PPL FOR HELPING ME..

THE LOSER
SHAFIK

2006-07-17T18:24:00.000-07:00
HEY PPL, LOOK LIKE I HAVE COOL DOWN SINCE THE LAST TIME I blog.. THINGS LATELY HAVE BEEN OK JUST THAT RECENTLY I HAD PRAYER FOR MINE GRANDPARENT AND THE NEXT DAY MINE UNCLE PASS AWAY! HAIZ.. LIFE DO LEAVE THIS WORLD WITH US NOTICING IT.. FUCK.. BUT WE HAVE TO BE READY FOR THIS TYPE OF THINGS.. LET NOT TALK ABT DEATH.. LATER I CURES PPL.. HAHA

WELL THE LATELY WOLS HAVE INTAKE 2 MORE WOLSIES.. LINYI AND DANICA.. WELCOM TO THE FAMILY.. HOPE U THE TWO OF U WILL BE EVEN WOLS..

TOADY MINE MOTHER BIRTHDAY.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA.. BUT THE THING ID THAT I HAVE NOT GOT HER ANYTHING DUE TO SHORTAGE OF CASH.. SORRY MAMA.. PROMISE I WILL GET U SOMETHING WENT I GOT THE CASH.. WELL BUT IN THE MEAN TIME I WILL STUDY HARD AND MAKE U PROUD.. LIKE WAT TAYLOR HICKS SANG DO I MAKE U PROUD.. MAMA I LOVE U A LOT AND NOT MAKE U SAD ANYMORE.. K?

WELL THAT ALL I HAVE FOR NOW LA.. SO STAY TUNE TO MINE BLOG.. HAHA

SHAFIK

2006-07-15T09:23:00.000-07:00
FUCK ST GABRIEL'S NPCC UNIT.. CI ALL LIKE FUCK.. NOT BE BUT THE REST.. HAIZ.. MAN.. REAFEL NOT CI I WILL QUIT.. THAT'S IT..

SHAFIK
THE ADVISOR

2006-07-07T11:06:00.000-07:00
mann today one hell of a day.. nah no mood to talk about it.. haha

found this sond nice hear.. so wanna share it with u ppl,

ci shafik

2006-07-05T10:20:00.000-07:00
HEY LONG TIME NO BLOG.. HAHA.. SORRY LA I LIKE LAZY TO BLOG.. HMM LOTS OF THINGS HAS HAPPEN AND I LATELY CAN HANDLE IT LOR.. THINGS LIKE npcc unit psroblem family problem and bookie doesn't wanna to pass me the fucking cash..

for the unit stuff i call melvin just now and tried to settle stuff with him and he say the i have not done my job as a ci?? is it true?? fuck la.. ge also never do wat he suppose as a fucking ci.. talk so big.. ya ya papaya.. chi bye.. when he and yaun long not in good term talk so nice to the rest of the ci.. say thing like u wanna to transfer to other unit.. the when u got rejected u come back to st gabriel u act like u damn big shot..!! who the fuck u think u r?? prime minister?? fuck u understand..!!

family problem
it is always about the most stupid and fucking father of mine?? y on earth i got him as a father??y la?? i wanna to know.. pls someone tell me leh??
talk about him make me angry..

bookie
fuck la they like extending the time la.. then i still have to pass xt the frecking money.. faster pass me the money leh??(bookie if ur reading this..)

yup that all i have to say..

ur not so bad ci

shafik

2006-06-28T10:05:00.000-07:00
hey! toDAY i feel fucking depress.. haiz! the reason is that i receive news from friends,that area 5 CI or HO has a problem with me or soME WHAT DON'T like how i run the atc!!
what IS really the problem i also don't know.. ya.. but they say that i do things to get the lime light.. is that true?? haiz and i don't think i wanna the lime light.. i do wats task is given to me with pride..but for otherss is different.. ya.. plus as for the unit thay say i to protective towards rafael and edwin.. and i like doing thing on my own.. YA SO WAT I M PROTECTIVE TOWARDS THEM.. CAUSE I HAVE FAITH IN THEM AND I WANT THEM TO BE A better CI THEN ME.. WHICH THEY HAVE ALREADY PROVE THEMSELF.. YA.. SO WATS WRONG IF I M CLOSE TO THEM OR PROTECTIVE TOWARDS THEM.. IS IT WRONG??

FOR THE AREA THING I DON'T KNOW LA.. WAT EVER I HAVE DONE I M SO SORRY

YA AS I M WRITING THIS I M CRYING..(INSIDE LA) WHAT THE FUCK.. LETS STOP HERE.. BB

SAD, USELESS, STUPID,PROTECTIVE, AND WHO SUCK
SHAIFK

2006-06-26T09:15:00.001-07:00
HEY I KNOW THAT I HAVE NOT BEEN BLOGGING.. SORRY I GUESS I M LAZY TO TYPE LA.. HAHA,... HMM LIFE HAVE BEEN OK LA.. I RECENTLY QUIT MY SCHOOL AND NOW DOING NOTHING.. THE REASON I QUIT IS THAT MY TEACHERS ARE ALL BUYIES.. YA.. ALL OF THE SUCKK.. OK I WILL TRY NOT TO USE BAD WORD TIS TIME ROUND.. HAHA.(WEIRD)..HAHA
IF THER IS ANY ADVISE PLS HELP ME.. PLS? I M IN NEED OF HELP..

AND RECENTLY I FEEL WEIRD.. IF U WANNA TO KNOW MSN ME.. AT shafikhoot01@hotmail.com

ya that all for today..

bb

weird guy

SHAFIK

2006-06-01T08:01:00.000-07:00
hey it have been awhile seen i blog.. sorry i have to study la i kana debart for the chi bye turning exam.. fucking shit bastard wat the fuck i do just didn't attend sch for 3lesson and argue with the fucking teacher he debart me.. chi bye.. he see my face not happy then debart me wat i his toy to play huh?? bastard..fuck the teacher.. well said enough about him.. will write soon after come back from batam..

cya ppl..

they guy who got debart
shafik

2006-05-28T16:40:00.000-07:00
wah lau puki mak tek tek tissue today rain, rain, rain chi bye.. rain till i can't even go jogging.. WHAT I CANNOT LOSE WEIGHT HUH?? MUST JOG LA.. SHIT HEAD.. look at my belly so fucking huge like santa.ya huh i can work part time for santa help deliver present to people..not bad got future.. ah enough of talking rubbish.. today really did nothing but sleep eat and sleep even more... fuck i forgot la guys born on 1988 to 15 march 1989 must sign up for army.. hahah lucky mann i born 12april 1989..

2006-05-24T20:10:00.000-07:00
AH YA I DAMN FUCKING LAZY TO WRITE LA.. BUT I ALSO BORED SO MUST WRITE LA.. HAHAH.. WELL TODAY MANY THINGY HAPPEN.. I ALSO DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START.. HMMM LET ME THINK..MORNING WOKE UP DO THE NORMAL STUFF.. THEN AFTER SCH I HEAD HOME PLAYED COM WHILE WAITING FOR THE BLOODY RAF.. TO TIRED THEN FELL ASLEEP..
HAHAH WHEN SLEEPING I DREAMT ABOUT THE WOLS BEING SEPARETED AND SOME THING HAPPEN.. THE EXCITING PART WAS ABOUT TO HAPPEN TILL MY SISTER WOKE ME UP AND SAY "OI SHAFIK UR BROTHER RAFAEL CALL" IN MY HEART CHI BYE,BASTARD, FUCKING HELL ANTI-CLIMAX.. SIGH.. I REALLY WONDER WILL WE STILL BE CLOSE TOGETHER?? TONNING?? LET DEPEND ON FATE.. YA..

THEN LATER ON WE MEET UP AND CYCLE TO HEARTLAND MALL (MACS)HAHA.. ATE THERE WHILE RAF STUDY.. PLAYED ID..HARRAY I LEVEL2.. CHI BYE SO LONG TO LEVEL UP HUH.. AFTER THAT WE MEET FISH AND XT.. HAHAH IT BEEN DAYS SEEN WE MET THEM.. FISH PON SCH!!!! WAH NJC LEH?? HAHAH.. YA.. WENT MACS AGAIN TALK CRAP THEN ALL WENT BACK.. THAT MY FUCKING LONG DAY..

SHIT HEAD SHAFIK

2006-05-21T08:15:00.000-07:00
AT LAST.. JUST GOT HOME FROM MY FIRST ATC AS A CI.. MANN ITS DAMN BLOODY STRESSFUL BUT FUN... WELL THE CAMPER WERE BLUR AND WERE LOST ON THE FIRST DAY. BUT THE GIRLS PERFORM THE BEST THROUGHOUT THE 3DAY CAMP.. I HAVE TO RESPECT THEM.. THE GUY FUCK LA.. I ALSO SHY TO SAY THEY ARE GUYS??CAUSE THEY ALL WERE SLACKING AND MAKING THE GIRLS DO WHAT EVER TASK THAT WERE GIVEN TO THEM BY ME OR MY FELLOW CI.

WELL I M INCHARGE OF GROUP 7..OH YA ALL THE GROUP WERE TO GIVE THEIR GROUP A NAME AND THEIR GROUP NAME MUST BE EITHER SWEETS OR CHOCOLATE.. WAT THE FUCK I STILL DON'T KNOW THE FUCKING GROUP NAME,YA...CHI-BY I CI ALSO DON'T KNOW MY GROUP PEOPLE NAME.. SIGH..

IN MY GROUP7 ALL OF THEM WERE GREAT ALL HAD THE LEADERSHIP IN THEM.. BUT I STILL HAVE TO SAY THE GIRLS THE BEST FROM CEDAR.. THE REASON LINYI GOT THE BEST FEMALE FOR THE GROUP7 IS THAT I HAVE SEEN HER LEAD THE WHOLE BATCH MATE DURING THE FIRST DAY AND IT WAS NOT TO BAD... AND WHEN THE TIME TO SELECT THE BEST I FIRST TOLD GROUP7 IT WAS (SYKIN FROM CEDAR) BUT I HAD TO THINK OVER.. CAUSE I HAVE NOT SEEN HER LEAD THE BATCH BUT ONLY THE GROUP.. IF U WANT TO WIN U NOT ONLY HAVE TO LEAD THE GROUP BUT THE BATCH PEOPLE.. SO WELL DONE LINYI.. U HAVE THE THING TO BE THE BEST.. OKOK ENOUGH OF GROUP7..THEY ARE THE BEST GROUP LA...

AS FOR THE REST OF THE SEC 3 U POEPLE ROCK CAUSE I HAD A GREAT TIME..

SORRY I HAVE TO SLEEP TO TIRED LA NEVER SLEEP FOR LIKE TWO DAYS.. BB U FUCKING SHIT HEADS..

YOUR FUCKING CI AKA(BEST CI)

SHAFIK

2006-05-17T18:50:00.000-07:00
HARLOW! hahah.. today i got no SCHOOL.. ite life is so fun.. its like up to the teacher weather they want to have lesson with u.. plus if u pon school they fuck care.. wah lau teacher like that who don't want??

well the plAnS i have for today,

1)go secomdary fuck cadet, give them the unit t-shirt which i design=) haha... screw them like mad to get them ready for ATC..

2)go aunty house to take my track pants for tommorrow atc...

3) pack the stupid fucking baG for atc.. ya

that all about it la for today..

SHAFIK

2006-05-15T04:08:00.000-07:00
WAH LAU AT LAST I GOT A BLOG.. HAHAH
I WOULD LIKE TO THANK MY SISTER FOR HELPING ME OPEN THIS THINGY...
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WELL TODAY NOTHING REALLY MUCH HAPPEN LA.. MET RAF AND HIS CLASSMATE.. HAHA HIS CLASSMATE WERE FRIENDLY LA AND ALSO LAME..WAT TO DO I GOT GRADE A FOR JOKING.. LOL..SIGH I REALLY GOT NOTHING TO SAY AT ALL.. SO YA BYE BYE..